U.S. vs. Iran (a Marxist perspective?)
by
Mickey Z.

Since quoting Marx makes a writer appear both more educated and more serious, I figured I'd start this piece about Iran with a bit of Marxism... from Duck Soup.
Now I'm not trying to imply the reasons America goes to war are
this frivolous but...WMDs? Hussein connected to 9/11? Spreading
democracy? Even Harpo would be laughing out loud.
The U.S. has a
long history of conjuring up dubious rationales to wage war...and this
goes for those on both sides of the proverbial aisle. During the 2004
presidential campaign, for example, Senator John F. Kerry declared:
"The United States of America never goes to war because we want to; we
only go to war because we have to."
Can someone ask Harpo to quiet down?
"He
started it" or "She hit me first." It's an excuse we all learn in
childhood. By portraying oneself as the target (or potential target) of
an unprovoked sneak attack; all bases are covered. As President Bush
explained on March 17, 2003, the night he gave Saddam Hussein a final
ultimatum, "The United States and other nations did nothing to deserve
or invite this threat, but we will do everything to defeat it."
More (Groucho) Marx: "Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?"
Our
history books and newspaper headlines portray an ever-benevolent U.S.
as minding its own business yet incessantly awakened by surprise events
and unprovoked threats that test its celebrated patience, e.g. the
sinking of the Maine, the attack on Pearl Harbor, and too many others
to detail here.
Now we have Iran, a nation with the audacity to
make decisions without first asking for U.S. permission. We are faced
with the spectacle of America (the only nation to have used nuclear
weapons on civilians) warning the world about how nuclear weapons might,
well, be used on civilians. We can't allow just anyone (except our
allies) acquire such technology. We can't let the Chinese arm men so
evil they might, well, use nuclear weapons on civilians. Before you
know it, Iran will be using depleted uranium and white phosphorous,
abusing prisoners, setting up interrogation centers in Eastern Europe,
spying on its own people, and fixing elections at home and abroad.
As (Groucho) Marx explained: "Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms."